TWITTER: @sirbacon123

15 January 2010

An Extra Shot of Reality

In the last decade, Starbucks has taught us more new words than Webster.

There’s Baristas and Frappuccinos, Tazo and Vivanno.

During final exams in college, I drank “a lot” of coffee, but a latte, never heard of it.

Of course, if you are looking for a lot of coffee now at Starbucks, don’t order a tall or even a large (grande).

You’ll need to get the Venti. (For the record, there is no result for Venti at

During this time of unemployment, I have done my best to stay away from Starbucks. If I am ordering a $4 drink, I want a little umbrella to come with it.

But this week, I decided to meet an old colleague for coffee at Starbucks to catch up on the good ole days.

Little did I know that I would learn another new term -- Ulcerative Colitis.

For those of you scoring at home, Ulcerative Colitis is a form of inflammatory bowel disease.

That’s the good news.

The bad news is my friend was told that this could be the early stage of colon cancer.

That announcement woke me up faster than my Skinny Extra Hot Soy Sugar Free Vanilla Latte, with an extra shot.

My buddy is in his early 40’s with a great wife, two fantastic children and plenty of money in the bank.

He’s just starting the second half of his life -- this can’t really be happening.

This can’t really be happening?

Wow, the same exact thought I had when I became unemployed.

Did I just compare unemployment to Cancer?

Talk about a reality check.

In the last year, I have thrown a pity party or ten because I had lost my job.

Unemployed? Me? How could I ever survive?

A real kick in the gut.

Well, not literally -- it’s my friend with the REAL kick in the gut.

He says that no matter how much he eats, he’s always hungry. And whenever he feeds that hunger, it’s ALWAYS a trip to the bathroom.

It sounds like the circle of life, but hopefully not death.

Anytime a doctor throws out the c-word, Cancer, everything comes to a stop -- I don’t care if it’s an early stage or the final phase.

To think, while I was surfing through the job sites, my friend was getting a colonoscopy. I was eating humble pie, he was drinking barium.


All of a sudden, unemployment was not that scary.

The truth of the matter is, my friend only has one life to play with. For me, there are plenty of jobs in this world.

I could always be a Barista.

I’m praying for you buddy.

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