I realize that this is not a sports blog, but it will be today.
If you are not interested in my opinion on the LeBron James story, you’ve got a 123 other entries to choose from.
If you are looking for a little love with your white wine, try this one:
Or if you are looking for something sweet, give this a spin:
Ok, now to our lead story:
Dearest LeBron,
I cannot remember the last sports story that brought out this much emotion in me.
And honestly, I’m not really sure if I can truly connect with those emotions.
But I’ll give it a try.
On one hand, I applaud you for making winning your #1 priority in choosing Miami over Cleveland.
Or New York.
Or Chicago.
If that’s in fact what you really did.
On every other hand, I am disgusted by you.
I must disclose that my mother comes from Cleveland, so there is no question that I speak from a somewhat biased perspective on this one.
But the bottom line is, did you really need a one-hour infomercial to announce that you were breaking up with the city of Cleveland?
The state of Ohio.
The bizillion fans who believed until last night that you were actually a good guy.
And please stop with the “I took less money to go to Miami.”
First of all, you will be getting paid $110 million over the six years to play a game.
In South Beach.
$110 Million!
Unemployment pays me like $450 a week.
Please don’t bring up the money.
And oh by the way, you made $90 Million from Nike before you ever played a game in the NBA.
I’ve got news for you LeBron, you will never ever do anything EVER again for the money.
PLEASE don’t ever bring up the money again.
You are right, it wasn’t about the money.
As for how you treated the Cavs...
I just heard that one in every four households in Cleveland watched your big announcement last night.
That's too bad.
I'm sure you were hoping to hurt everyone there.
I’m not sure if your former boss Dan Gilbert, the owner of the Cavs, was one of those watching your three-ring circus last night, but I'm sure he heard about your decision.
Unfortunately it wasn’t from you.
Did you owe him a call? Owe? Perhaps not.
Should you have given him a call? Yes.
Did you give him a call? NO!
If for no other reason to appear to be a good guy, you could have done a whole lot of damage control by giving Gilbert a call before you made the announcement.
Or even a text.
Or a tweet.
Or a poke.
Or something.
If I heard correctly, you were playing in a charity softball game the night before this decision was announced.
Was that practice for the softball questions that you were going to get from the guys wearing the microphones for ESPN?
Unfortunately practice didn't make perfect.
You struck out.
I watched every single second of the broadcast and almost every second of the show after the broadcast.
Until I started gagging.
There was no way I was going to miss it.
But to paraphrase the late great announcer Jack Buck, I couldn’t believe what I just saw.
I cannot believe that somebody, who claims to be the King, is going to give up a two-thirds of his crown to join somebody else’s monarchy.
From day one, you’ve made no secret about the fact that Michael Jordan is your mentor, your hero, a major influence in your life.
Well as somebody who has lived the game of basketball for the last 35 years, I’m afraid to tell you, you will never be like Mike.
There is NO WAY Michael Jordan would’ve signed with the Lakers to play WITH Magic Johnson and James Worthy.
And there is NO WAY that Michael Jordan would’ve signed with the Celtics to play WITH Larry Bird and Jerry Sichting.
What made and still makes Michael Jordan the greatest of all-time is that when he came into the game, Magic and Larry were still wearing those short shorts, playing on the big stage every night.
Michael came in, grabbed the game by the throat and took the crown away from them.
He didn’t take the easy way out.
He didn’t Rosie Ruiz a championship.
He made B.J. Armstrong a champion.
You could’ve done the same, but you didn’t.
The reason that Kobe Bryant wanted a fourth title so bad wasn’t because he needed a ring to match the one he gave his wife.
It was because he needed a ring that didn’t have Shaq’s name on it.
IF you win a championship in Miami with your good pals, and I pray to the Gods of Mark Price & Larry Nance that you don’t, it will come with an asterisk the size of Barry Bonds skull.
Nobody and I mean NOBODY will respect you for bringing two bullies to the bike rack with you at 3 O’clock to beat up the President of the Science Club.
There would’ve been nothing sweeter in your life than winning a championship with the Cleveland Cavaliers.
Or even the Los Angeles Clippers.
Insert joke here.
I’m glad that your mother played such an important role in helping you accept your decision to (not) take the money and run.
I wish she would’ve added that taking the easy way out is no way to go through life.
Let me tell you LeBron, I love watching you play the game of basketball.
When it is all said and done, you may go down as the greatest basketball player of all-time.
Just like Alex Rodriguez may go down as the greatest baseball player of all-time.
Or Tiger Woods.
Or O.J. Simpson.
Congratulations LeBron.
You just joined a club that you will be in forever.
The heat is on.
Good luck buddy.
You’ll need it.
2 comments:
As a former Clevelander, and a decent human being, I enjoyed your post. I hope you get work soon.
LeBron may have signed for less money but he will actually end up making MORE because Florida does NOT have State Income Tax - while Ohio does - and in the long run this will mean enough so that he will make MORE by playing in Florida. I rooted like.........for A-Fraud not to win a WS - gonna root like.......for LeBron to have the same thing happen. I do NOT fault him for leaving the Cavs because he NEVER would won it all there and w/o at least 1 NBA Title his career is a FAILURE - I just have a problem with the way it all went about.
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