No Foolin'

It was exactly a year ago today that my then 10-year old son scared me to death.

It was approximately 3:15am, on April 1st, when his rooster alarm clock bellowed COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO over and over and over and over and over again until I located it underneath my bed.

Aside from the fact that it woke me up from a deep sleep, it really frustrated me that I couldn’t initially locate it.

When I did, I nearly threw it through a wall.

I’ve got a very good sense of humor, but this was one joke that didn’t make me laugh.

I was fuming and I let him know about it.

I also let my friend Phil know about it and he laughed at me.

Thankfully that reality check helped me come back to earth very quickly and it also reminded me that my son is one funny kid.

Even in the middle of the night.

Considering my reaction 365 nights ago, I wasn’t really worried about him pulling that same prank again this year.

But this year I was up until the wee hours anyway.

Wide awake until about 2:00am, just like most nights these days.

I wouldn’t call it insomnia or stress or anything like that.  I just like staying up late.   

I like late night talk shows.  I like writing my blog at Midnight.  I like listening to the sound of a silent house.

This week at my therapy session, I casually mentioned that I have not been sleeping much.

Now my therapist and I have pretty much talked about everything since I first walked into her room more than a year ago.

Marriage.  Unemployment.  Depression.  Suicide.

Slow down there, not my suicide, but the desperation that it must take for somebody to be able to take their own life.

Deep down, I think she really gets me.   She has helped me get through this most tumultuous of times.

But this week when I mentioned that I hadn’t been sleeping, I saw concern in her eyes.

For the first time.

I think she bought my explanation that I like staying up late because I like watching TV at that time.

I hope she bought it.   It’s the truth.

The bottom line for me is that life has taken on a most serious turn recently and learning how to deal with those obstacles is a daily challenge.

Perhaps the best way to deal with stress is by keeping a good sense of humor and today there was plenty to laugh about.

I think I made it pretty clear to my son that I wasn’t interested in being on either side of his April Fools pranks this year, but that certainly didn’t stop him.

Among the tricks he pulled off today:

• he put red food coloring in the vanilla ice cream and then said that he sneezed in it

•  he put split pea soup in the toilet and then had his mom check because “somebody had clogged it”

• he put his younger sister’s stuff animal, a skunk, in the microwave so that she would be greeted with a surprise when she opened the door

• he sent his older sister a fake email claiming that Joe Jonas is now bankrupt

Just imagine if he would’ve put half of that effort into his Social Studies paper.

He pretty much hit everybody, but me and the dog.

And that’s fine with me.

As he left for school this morning, I told him to make sure that he doesn’t do anything that he will regret.

“Am I allowed to get gum and put it in the urinals?”

NO!

“Am I allowed to tell people we are moving?”

Sure.

I mean NO!   

I quickly reminded him that his mother teaches at his school and if there’s a story that gets out that we are moving, nothing good can come out of that.

Especially these days where she is the one in our one-family income.

“Can I wear an arm sling to my baseball practice today to scare my coach?”

Ok.

Hopefully that will hold him over for a year.