This Direction Home

In the Ballad of a Thin Man, the great poet from Minnesota, Robert Zimmerman said that “something is happening here, but you don’t know what it is.”

I know he wasn’t talking about me, but those words describe how I’m feeling at the moment.

Not in a bad way either.

Since joining the unemployed fraternity more than 18 months ago, I’ve experienced more ups and downs than the New York Stock Exchange.

I can't really pinpoint why I’m feeling bullish at the moment other than to say, I'm feeling some kind of buzz and thankfully it’s not my vibrating cell phone.

It could be because in the last few days, I have spoken with a couple of former colleagues about working on some new projects with them.

But that’s really nothing new.

Talk is something we have done a lot of in the last year.

Maybe what makes this different is that these new talks seem to have had a lot more to them than just, “wouldn’t it be cool if _____.”

This time, we’ve put our thoughts on paper.

This time, we’ve developed a game plan for our success.

And perhaps most important -- this time, I’ve started to believe.

It’s pretty amazing how your inner emotions can drive you – either down an open road or over a cliff.

That part is up to you.

Maybe Mr. Zimmerman is referring to that emotional force when he said, “It takes a lot to laugh, It takes a train to cry.”

Or maybe I have no idea what he meant by that.

But the bottom line is right now I’m feeling good.

And that feels great.

Even if it’s only for a day.

Maybe this new burst of optimism is a giant mirage in the middle of the desert or maybe, just maybe, there is actual water this time.

Last night I spoke with an old boss who said that he may have a project for me to work on with him in the next couple of months.

He said that he “may”.

According to dictionary.com, the word “may” is “used to express possibility.”

So, he could “possibly” have a project for me, in a couple of months.

Possibly is defined as “perhaps.”

So, perhaps he may possibly have a job for me in a couple of months.

In a couple of months.

Have you ever heard of anything more definite than that?

Have you ever heard of anything more beautiful than that?

Mr. Zimmerman also informed us that “you don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.”

Very true.

If you want to believe something bad is about to happen, that’s easy to do.

If you want to believe something good is about to happen, you can do that too.

Of course it’s not as easy, but it’s true.

But why is it that we all lock in on the negative?

If your child comes home with a report card with five A’s and a B+, take a guess which grade will get the most attention.

If you answered A, you are wrong.

Do I have any more of a reason now to believe that there is a light at the end of this miserable tunnel than there was two days ago?

No, not really.

But I do.

I guess when you ain’t got nothin, you got nothin to lose.