Honorable Mention

I am officially running for Father of the Week.

I realize it is a long shot, and I know the week is not over, but I feel like I’ve done my part to at least be under consideration for the award.

Of course, I have my good friend unemployment to thank for giving me this great opportunity and a boat load of free time.

The week began on Monday with Field Day.

Field Day is the official name for “kids get a day out of the classroom to play a bunch of games in a local park.”

It always comes at the end of the year and ours included a BBQ, jumpy castle, pickup soccer games, softball, lacrosse and a whole lot of quality gossip time.

My daughter and her friends seemed to enjoy the last part more than anything.

She took full advantage of the break to hang out with her buddies, but we did sneak in a four-on-four flag football game before lunch.

There were probably more than 200 students there, representing sixth, seventh and eighth grades.

The sixth graders occupied most of the field, playing every game possible.

The seventh graders huddled in groups, talking about... ...whatever seventh graders talk about.

And the eighth graders were counting the minutes to the end of their middle school career.

Even though I was not invited into the gossip groups, I think I earned major points for just being there.

Tuesday was a day for daughter #2, child #3.

And it was a big day too.   It was her Kindergarten graduation.

Tuesday is also the day that my 80-year old mother and I get together each week for a little nosh.

But instead of a meal, this time I picked her up at the assisted living facility and brought her to school for the ceremony.

I wouldn’t say I am Captain Sentimental, but I certainly enjoyed the concept of giving my mom the opportunity to be there.

If you’ve ever been to one of these events, it’s 90% who cares and 190% the greatest show on earth.

(The 190 part is anything involving your child.)

I don’t know how they did it, but this Kindergarten sendoff somehow turned into a one-hour production -- full of songs, stories and a nicely edited music video to pictures of the kids.

At the end, my daughter came over to give everyone a hug, including my mom, which forced me to use the final kleenex in the box.

My mom has been through hell and back in her life, so to see her enjoying herself, even for an hour, is a great occasion.

Article #3 in my bid for Father of the Week came on Wednesday with another field trip.

This time, my son’s fifth grade class took a trip to a Tattoo and Piercing Convention....

...better known as a local amusement park.

I’m not one to judge pure beauty, but I’m guessing a LARGE percentage of the people drawing on and cutting into their skin will regret it at some point in their life.

Heart tattoo on the arm with your kid’s name.  Cool.

Nose piercing.  Hip.

Gallons of permanent ink covering your face and/or neck.   Disgusting.

I realize I sound 196 years old, but I’m just sayin.

Nevertheless, we spent five hours going on rides that took us upside down and inside out.  There were more twists and turns than the Lost finale.

We got there early enough to avoid any lines and by the time it got busy we were back on the school bus headed home.

It was a great day.

I really thought I had clinched the award.

Or so I thought.

As hard as it was, I refused to give in to each of my son’s requests to spend money at the park.

And there were many of them.

Dippin Dots.  Cotton Candy.  Funnel Cake.  Stuffed Animal.

No, no, no and no.

The last thing he needed was ANY of that, especially at those prices, but I must say seeing your child with puppy dog eyes usually works -- even at age 11.

It definitely worked for the new favorite for Father of the Week.

One of the dads on the trip was determined to win his daughter a GIANT stuffed animal in one of the carnival games.

And the game looked pretty easy.

You have five metal disks -- each the size of a DVD.   All you have to do is drop the five disks, one by one, onto a wooden board and cover a red circle that is about six inches wide.   

Cover the circle, you win.

Leave any part of the red showing and you lose. 

Each game costs $3 or you can play twice for $5.

You only need to win once to take home a bear three times the size of your child.

That should’ve been his first clue.

Or his 17th clue.   Or 33rd.

When all was said and done, he had donated $110 to the arcade and had exactly zero wins.

I can only imagine what a trip to Las Vegas costs him.

The high schooler working at the park must’ve felt really bad for him, so he gave the determined dad a much smaller stuffed animal as a parting gift.

Mission accomplished.

I saw the little girl smiling from ear to ear as she boarded the bus with her new friend.

Playing countless carnival games to win your daughter a new stuffed animal.  $110.

Spending the week with your kids.  Priceless.

Maybe I am still in the running to win the award after all.

Back To School

Like many people out of work, I decided to go back to school.

But for me, my return to school was a field trip to a local wildlife museum last week with my six-year old daughter’s kindergarten class.

This was the latest example of something good that can happen when you are out of work -- being involved with the kids' life.

Sure I was involved before, but only when it worked into my schedule.

Well my schedule was wide open last Friday. And if it wasn’t, it would be.

Not even a bus ride with 50 kindergartners was going to keep me from going on this trip. I know it meant a lot to my daughter, but it meant A LOT to me too.

We sat next to each other on the bus.

We toured the Museum together.

We ate lunch together.

We watched a film on Animals, together.

I’ve had some pretty good days in my life, but this was definitely on the list.

Not to mention, what a great distraction from the world of reality.

In the group with my daughter and I were three of her classmates and a mom.

I did my best to mingle with the other six-year-olds, but either the animals were distracting or they just didn’t find me interesting.

Fortunately, the other grown up was a very nice person. A mother of five, who moved to the U.S. from Colombia about 11 years ago.

Her kids range in age from five to 22, so she has pretty much seen it all.

About ten minutes before the end of the tour, I heard the question I somehow hear everyday.

“So what do you for a living?”

Well, she asked the question, so I gave the answer -- as quickly as possible.

That’s when she shared with me that she’s been out of work too, for about a month.

It’s not the first time she’s been unemployed, but it is the first time that she’s not sure if she’s going to be able to find another job.

I know that feeling.

Of course, she also shared the bright side of unemployment, like being able to sleep at night without her cell phone.

Or being able to go on a field trip without texting.

I remember my first month of unemployment. I was pretty optimistic too.

I still try to keep a positive outlook, but once you’ve celebrated your one year anniversary without a job, that’s a lot easier said than done.

Our little talk reminded me that there is no escaping unemployment, not even on a kindergarten field trip, but the rest of the trip was great.

Even the bus ride home.

To keep everyone entertained, my daughter’s teacher asked the kids to search for red cars.

The tally moved from one to 20, pretty quickly.

Then 30, 40, 50, all the way up to 117 as we moved within a mile or so of the school.

My daughter then spotted five red cars in a parking lot, at which point the puzzled teacher said, now how many is that?

My daughter mumbled 117 plus 5, then she shouted...

122!

Oh, that’s right, the teacher said.

Wait a minute, I smell something funny going on here.

We’re not spotting red cars, we are having a math test.

No wonder I was such a bad student.

Not only did I struggle with the questions and answers, but I didn’t even know there was an exam being given.

Well, either way, I think I graduated my latest test as a dad.

And that's all that matters.